If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a bank (I would buy you CitiBank)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd get you a mortgage for your house (from Freddie Mac or Fannie Mae)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd buy you General Motors (or maybe Ford or Chrysler)
If I had a trillion dollars, I'd buy your votes
If I had a trillion dollars
I'd build a windmill in your yard
If I had a trillion dollars
You could drive a new electric car
If I had a trillion dollars
Maybe we'd have universal health care, too!
Wouldn't that be great? You could go see a doctor any time at all - for free!
They already have that in Canada, ya know.
How's that working out for them?
Not so well - long waits - they all come here for health care...
Ouch!
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd buy you AIG (and maybe BearStearns and Merrill Lynch)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd pay all of your tuition (you can get a Harvard or Yale degree)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd buy you Alan Greenspan's remains (but I don't think he's even dead yet)
If I had a trillion dollars, I'd buy your votes
If I had a trillion dollars
We wouldn't have to work a job no more
If I had a trillion dollars
We'll tax the rich until they're poor
If I had a trillion dollars
We wouldn't vote Republican anymore
Well, I might...
Me, too...
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Who's gonna pay for all this?
Not me!
You got kids?
Yeah, but-
Grandkids?
Sure, but-
Their grandkids... and theirs... and theirs...
Wow!
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If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd find the cure for cancer (and maybe even HIV)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd buy you a hybrid car (but not a Hummer or an SUV)
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
I'd bring the troops home from Iraq (and then send them to Afghanistan)
If I had a trillion dollars, I'd buy your votes
If I had a trillion dollars - ya know, I might need two or three
If I had a trillion dollars - we can borrow from the Chinese
If I had a trillion dollars -
We'll go broke!